Let's get one thing straight: I might not be a car thief, but I'm still WAY better than the half-assed ones they have down in Florida.  I don't know how to hotwire a car, how to use a slim jim to break into a car, or even what kind of blunt instrument to use if I were going to smash the window of a car. I'd even be a little stressed about peeling out without taking the time to adjust my mirrors properly

Originally posted here:
Stealing cars with people in them is dumb

I was certain that to maintain equilibrium, fast food joints allowed their employees to be as intoxicated as the people who eat there. Last night two employees of a national Mexican-themed snack shack were arrested for alleged public drunkenness while on the job in OKlahoma City, OK.

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It’s a crime to not let fast food employees be drunk

A teenage driver in Bridgeville,PA who had just passed his driving test lost control of the vehicle and crashed into the DMV upon returning the driver's training vehicle. Three people were injured although not seriously. The accident occurred when the teen was dropping off the instructor who had just given the exam.

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Teen drives straight into DMV after passing test

During her field sobriety test last Thursday, 38-year-old Sheryl A. Urzedowski offered to do a gymnastics move for cops before really strutting her stuff, performing a hand-on-hips model walk, according to police in Orland Park, IL.

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DUI suspect prefers catwalk to perp walk?

Two alleged Illinois drug traffickers were discovered with 50 kilograms of cocaine in their trunk because they parked illegally in the driveway leading up to the Cook County Sheriff's Office. Aside from the dim-witted parking job, the men, Jose Ramirez-Rodriguez and Efrain Rodriguez Juarez (pictured) had a statue of Jesus Malverde on the center console.

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Patron saint can’t protect stupid criminals

Above, stills from a video the Utah Highway Patrol department released of an incident involving Haylee Arnell, pictured at right, who allegedly drove the wrong way on I-15 Wednesday and rammed head on into a police cruiser in the HOV lane . Arnell, 19, faces seven charges including DUI, unsafe lane travel and trying to leave the scene of the accident, according to the Utah County Sheriff’s Office

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Wrong way=bad way for Utah driver

Authorities pulled over an intoxicated Bethany, NY man who was driving with a license that had been expired for 33 years . Duane Bush (pictured) had been driving his van despite the fact that his right rear tire had fallen off 11 miles earlier. Bush, no relation to the former president, has been charged with aggravated DWI and operation of a vehicle without a license.

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3 tires, 1 dumb driver

Mathew Pellegrino, pictured, graduated from college last year and majored in print journalism, which is sort of like the dumbest thing ever.  However, young Mat actually landed a job in this crap economy and in his dying field just one month after graduation for the Press Gazette out of north west Florida.

Read more here:
Woman crashes into cosmetics store; cub reporter on it like white on rice

Rickey Sharratt of Camas, WA was found guilty of illegally off-roading and destroying state forestland earlier this year. He was busted when his SUV got stuck in the mud. Pretty dumb, huh?

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Off-Roader calls apology video a ‘bunch of baloney’

 Amish teen, Levi Detweiler, pictured, was driving a horse and buggy last week when he allegedly led Cattaraugus County, NY sheriff’s deputies on a chase after running a stop sign and refusing to pull over.

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Horse and buggy teen lead police on chase