Apparently Wi-Fi may be damaging your reproductive swimmers. Before you pull that hot laptop away from your precious cargo, I'll ask: is starting a family really worth giving up the benefits a wireless connection provides you on a daily basis? Before you make up your mind, let's look at why the internet is worth the risk: 1.)  Sure, a child can look you in the eyes and tell you they love you

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10 reasons the internet is better than starting a family

This weekend serves as the 28th annual Interplanetary Conclave of Light , a two-day festival which is allegedly celebrated on 33 planets across the universe, including worlds we've never heard of like Vixall and Enishia. What, you forgot to break out your alien party hat? The special event marks Earth's invitation into the Interplanetary Confederation — kind of like the United Nations, but with planets.

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Pro-UFO organization celebrates big this weekend

In the UK a kitten stupidly named “Kitler” is routinely passed over for adoptions at the pound because she has markings on her face that invoke the spirit of you, guessed it, Adolf Hitler. The lovable little fluff ball is a mostly white pretty kitty with black markings between her soft little nose and mouth. It definitely looks like a mustache, but why does it have to exclusively be a Hitler 'stache?

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Not adopting a kitten because you think it’s a Nazi is dumb

A man in Los Angeles earned himself a trip to the hospital after performing surgery on himself. With a butter knife

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Performing surgery on yourself is possibly the dumbest thing you can do

Sports have become an invasive, time wasting activity, thanks to the efforts of greedy owners who wouldn’t consider giving a fan who was on fire a glass of water without charging him three times what he paid for it. It would be nice if there were a way to combine sports so we could get twice the value out of an already overpriced product, but then we’d be forced to sit through a game that’s dumber than soccer, croquet and disc golf (which may or may not be a combined sport yet).  1.)  Chess Boxing (chess and boxing) Some say that high contact sports like boxing don’t require a lot of brains to compete in and nothing could be further from the truth.

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8 dumbest hybrid sports

Long distance swimmer Diana Nyad has decided to swim 103 miles through shark infested waters at the age of 61. She'll be in the water for 60 hours straight.  She's expected to hallucinate and get stung repeatedly by jellyfish

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Swimming with sharks is stupid. Stupid awesome.

Now that Dateline 's Chris Hansen is no longer confronting those rotten child molesters, he's decided to go after the real scum of the earth — bike thieves. In this hilarious clip , Chris confronts a pawn shop owner for buying a stolen bike.

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Chris Hansen has resorted to battling bike thieves

As clouds descended upon New York City at 5:30pm Saturday, I wondered for a split second if they were right . I peered out my window for potential locusts only to find that it was just a spring thunderstorm.

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POLL: Are you upset the world didn’t end Saturday?

Only the finest moments make it into Today's Riff with Matt Arden and truTV served up one heck of an idiotic offering. Watch this now-classic clip of women with booze-thirsty vaginas that moonlight as magicians and be sure to check out more hilarious clips on tbs.com .

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There’s a way to make liquor disappear without drinking it

Vacations are for the weak. They are also for Europeans

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Vacations are for the weak, Europeans